Why New Year's Resolutions Fail And How Yours Can Succeed

It’s that time of year again. We think, “New year, new me!” — crafting (often the same) New Year’s resolutions year after year only to fail miserably and totally abandon the commitment we fervently held just a month earlier.
 
Take the most common, mundane resolution: Losing weight. We join a gym, get hyped about the latest fad diet, and muscle our way toward a specific weight goal. We hope that spending money on membership fees, emptying our pantry of refined carbs, and sheer willpower and discipline will lead to success.
 
And then we give up because it just gets too hard: the diet’s unsustainable, we give in to cravings, we get too busy to go to the gym, and excuses and lapses pile up. Willpower and discipline? Nowhere to be found.
 
The problem? We live in a culture of immediate gratification. We want maximum results with minimum effort. We BELIEVE change should be quick and easy. The reality? Change takes time, commitment, planning, and soul-searching. And that’s where COACHING comes in — to move you through this process of change effectively.
 
Coaches help you SEE change differently, so you can MAKE change happen. Coaching moves you:
  • FROM Making broad, sweeping changes TO Planning out small, specific, incremental adjustments
  • FROM Setting arbitrary, unrealistic timelines TO Seeing the big picture of growth over the long haul
  • FROM Focusing on outcomes TO Focusing on systems
  • FROM Doing tasks TO Finding and becoming your truest identity
  • FROM Relying solely on self TO Finding accountability from a supportive community
 
Coaching lays out a unique, customized path toward your hopes and aspirations. In January, I am offering a discounted “New Year’s” rate of $50/month, which includes 3 weekly 40-50 minute calls. I would love to help you move toward your truest self, so what are you waiting for? Invest in yourself by emailing me at veledatailifecoaching@gmail.com. Let’s talk!

Myth #3: Conflict ruins relationships; Preserve “peace” at all costs

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December 17, 2020

“I’d like to take Mei out for mother-daughter time on Wednesdays,” I declared to my husband. “But I’m hoping to take her out driving more — she needs the practice.”  “Uh…you can, but this is something I’d like to do,” I said, confused. “She’s graduated from practicing in a parking lot. Just give me your errands so I have …

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Myth #2: Negative Emotions Are Dangerous

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December 10, 2020

I hate shopping with my husband. And, right there, as soon as I typed that first sentence, I wanted to replace “hate” with “dislike” because “hate” feels too strong. I have an instinctive urge to soften the intensity of my negative emotions because of a deeply ingrained belief that negative emotions are dangerous—as in volatile, …

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Myth #1 Ignore Unwanted Emotions, They’ll Eventually Go Away

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December 3, 2020

I’m a rabid Michigan fan — especially football. And anyone who follows college football knows it’s been a rough couple of decades for us. Every Saturday from Labor Day to Thanksgiving, I am on pins and needles about how my Wolverines will do. When Michigan wins, all is well in the world. But when we lose, …

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Happy Thanksgiving!

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November 26, 2020

Untangling Emotions

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November 19, 2020

As we collectively reel with the continued emotional upheaval of 2020, it feels more essential than ever to understand our emotions: What purposes do they serve? Why do we so often try to avoid them? What does God expect us to do with them? Emotions are often a complex, tangled mess. Especially if, like me, you …

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How to Talk to People who Disagree with You Politically

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November 12, 2020

Glued to the election coverage, I couldn’t help thinking that each time my hopes were rising, someone else’s were falling, and each time mine were falling, theirs was rising. And back and forth it went for all of us. If you are mourning the election results, allow yourself space and time to grieve well. Don’t judge yourself on …

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